I Don't Want to Live in New York (And That's Okay)
The 'fashion girlie' to NYC pipeline has long been the default path—but what happens when we start forging our own?
“I don’t want to live in New York City,” I say as I’m deep in the trenches of expressing how:
Jealous I am of everyone who got to shop Chloë Sevigny’s closet sale 2 years ago.
I’d love to try a matcha from the Uniqlo Coffee Shop on 5th Avenue.
Insane it is that people can hang out at the Met on a random Tuesday.
Sure, I get FOMO like everyone else.
It’s hard not to, when my entire digital existence equates to one giant billboard that reads, “Your life will have no meaning unless you move to Manhattan.” Talk about algorithmic peer pressure.
(Almost) every creative, fashion designer, journalist, podcaster, writer, etc. I admire, lives in New York City. Hell, even the fictional ones.
They scored an internship at Fashionista, or W Magazine, or ELLE right out of college and did “the damn thing.” Or, if they didn’t, they created a name for themselves online and eventually made the inevitable move… because duh.
I’m a fashion writer. For the past three years, I’ve lived in the suburbs of Atlanta, Georgia.
Oftentimes, when my newsletter (the one you’re reading right now) comes up in conversation, there’s an assumption that if I’m serious about it, there’s only one trajectory…The one that involves squeezing myself (and my growing collection of primary colored pop art) into a 600 square ft apartment with no in-unit washer/dryer.
I’ll (respectfully) pass.
Though I understand. The aspirational image of a stylish, stressed-out woman hustling through Manhattan with a Prada bag in one hand and iced coffee in the other was burned into my brain before I even knew how to pronounce the word “haute.” New York City is where fashion happens. The shows, the sample sales, the magazine offices, and the surplus of fashionable women taking “fit check” videos in front of historic brownstones. It’s fun. It’s chic.
But here’s the thing: we need to normalize the idea that being passionate about fashion doesn’t have to come with a lease in the West Village.
And we need to stop assuming everybody wants the same thing. And that everyone wants to live the same life. There’s an undeniable gatekeeping that happens when one or two cities (Los Angeles, being the other) are seen as the only places where taste exists. Where real fashion careers exist.
If you're not physically showing up to NYFW, brunching with editors, or squeezing into a shoebox in Bushwick—do you even matter? Are you even relevant?
Not everyone wants (or can afford) to have that kind of proximity. Living in New York often means trading in stability, disposable income, mental clarity, and literal space for [insert goal here]. If you’re passionate about the fashion industry, you shouldn’t have to uproot your life (and finances) to prove it.
The classic New York fashion writer trajectory? Of course, it’s iconic for a reason. That path has launched brilliant writers, editors, and creative directors whose voices helped shape the industry. It’s valid. It’s aspirational. But it doesn’t need to be the only way.
The internet has obviously changed how we share and shape fashion. You can write runway recaps from your couch in Ohio, film styling videos from your suburban home in Jersey, and even interview designers over Zoom from an apartment in Baltimore. Not to mention, airplanes do exist.
Talent and taste shouldn’t be bound by a zip code. There are so many incredible fashion writers and creators outside of NYC and LA, and they deserve to be seen not as “exceptions,” but as part of the fabric of the industry.
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Fashion Lives Everywhere: The Case for Location Diversity
When everyone lives in the same place, the stories start to sound the same.
While I don’t agree with the viral TikTok video by Martini Feeny bashing NYC influencers because they are necessarily “boring,” there is something to be said about the homogeneous nature of fashion content in 2025.
The same neighborhoods, the same cafes, the same vintage markets, the same twenty people at a launch event—it can start to feel like a loop. And while the NYC community is beautiful, it becomes a bit tired when it’s the only thing you’re fed.
I love lobster, but not for every meal.
Even the homogenous nature of specific areas of New York City (in general) has become quite the subject for recent essays/think pieces— the most popular being Brock Colyar’s piece: It Must Be Nice to Be A West Village Girl for The Cut. Colyar writes:
“There’s a cult mentality” to the neighborhood, McKeon continued. It’s true that many of the young women passing by the bar looked like her clones. They move through the neighborhood in packs, wearing the local uniform: a white tank, light-wash jeans, and Sambas, an iced matcha latte in hand, and hair slicked back into a tight ponytail. It was chilly, so several of them, McKeon cheekily pointed out through the window, were also wearing Aritzia Super Puffs, as she was, in the color matte pearl. “I feel like everyone else here in some way,” McKeon told me. “That’s the point of it, I guess.”
Countless 20-somethings are moving to the Big Apple in droves, just to happily toss away all sense of self, to live a life that’s “deemed” ideal. AKA the life of Carrie Bradshaw. Invasion of the Body Snatchers wasn’t just a movie, it seems. The uniformity that exists within certain areas of New York City and on social media is now SO apparent that it’s become a major piece of the cultural conversation.
As long as a place as culturally rich as New York is the backdrop to your life, you’re instantly more interesting, more desirable, and more destined to be taken seriously as an authority on fashion/lifestyle. Place these women in Cleveland, Ohio, and we may never know their names. New York City is their famous friend, and they are constantly doing collabs with “it” to gain notoriety. They are Jonathan Cheban. The city is Kim Kardashian.
Note: This is not everyone who lives in New York City. I know countless interesting writers, creators, etc. with a strong POV, personal style, and sense of self!!
But, there is real value in location diversity online—in hearing from someone covering fashion from their small town in Washington or a big city in the Midwest. Places that are rarely framed as fashion capitals still hum with style and culture to be celebrated, dissected, and talked about… Fashion creators from all across the country, the continent, and the globe have perspectives that bring immense value, uniqueness, and #pizazz to the space.
Different Cities, Same Passion: Fashion Writing Without a New York Address
This discussion is bigger than me, so I’ve called in reinforcements. I spoke to some of my favorite fashion writers (not based in NYC or LA) about the topic at hand. Not to mention, they are way smarter, successful, and cooler than “yours truly”, so let’s hand them to microphone for a sec.
Introducing the wonderful:
Kelly Williams — author of Midimalist
From Denver, Kelly dissects trends, creates smart outfit formulas for those of us who need a little help getting dressed, and writes (beautifully & honestly) about personal style.
Viv Chen — author of The Molehill
From San Francisco, Viv writes an incredibly successful fashion newsletter AND works as a freelance writer. She’s been published in Vogue, The Strategist, Marie Claire, etc. Her writing is steeped in passion for vintage finds, appreciation of the Bay Area, and love of a good cultural analysis.
Rachel Solomon — author of Hey, Mrs. Solomon
From Miami, Rachel helps readers find the joy in getting dressed. Her writing (along with her personal style) is ridiculously fun, rich, and captivating. She really is a creative pragmatist in action!!
Where are you currently based? And how does that place show up in the way you think about or write about fashion?
Kelly: I’m based out of Denver, Colorado, which has a reputation for being very casual. Most people who live in Colorado appreciate the access to the mountains (and therefore mountain sports), and there’s a reputation that everyone is into being outdoors. And while my fashion choices are different from a lot of my fellow Coloradians, there is actually a very strong sense of style here. It’s been interesting in recent years to see Miu Miu’s rope sandals go viral or to read about how technical jackets are trending; those types of garments are a mainstay in the wardrobe of people in Colorado. High fashion declared them “cool” and styled them with irony, but they have always been part of the style of my state.
Viv: San Francisco, CA! This place has absolutely shaped the way I think/write about fashion. The Bay Area has such a deep tradition of intellectual inquiry, social activism, and just…savoring the joy in pondering over ideas. Maybe it’s the fog.
Rachel: I’m based in Miami, and it is deeply who I am in every fiber of my body! It permeates my style and entire outlook. Practically, I can see what people are wearing all year long. And I am walking distance to the Design District, where we see a lot of “firsts” —like ours was the first store to get Pharrell’s recent LV Pool collection, lots of things like that. But also, walking through the world (versus rushing out of the cold) has made me far better able not only to see but to feel. To be curious. To feel for others. And that reflects itself in some of my best writing, I think.
Do you ever feel like there’s an unspoken pressure to move to NYC or LA if you’re serious about fashion? Has this affected you at all? FOMO?
Kelly: So, just recently, I was on TikTok, and an influencer based on the West Coast was visiting NYC, posting content. One of her comments was, “How hard do I have to beg my husband to move here?” And I felt sad because I really like her content (in part), because she has a unique perspective, but she obviously feels like she needs to be in NYC.
I understand that there are more JOBS in fashion in New York City, because so many brands are based there—so people are working for brands doing styling, PR, merchandising, design, etc. LA has a lot of styling for movies, celebrities, wealthy clients, etc. So, for me, when TikTok took off, I noticed many women posting their outfits were living in NYC and working in fashion. If anything, I feel pressure to be in NYC so I can work directly in the industry instead of as a hobby.
Viv: Yes, NYC and LA are the biggest urban hubs for the fashion and media industries. You can network more easily in those cities if you want a career in those fields. I lived in LA for a little while after college, so I know what that experience is like. Loved parts of it, but the Bay Area is the right place for me at this point in life. Who knows about the future, though? Life is long.
This might sound strange, but when it comes to my actual day-to-day quality of life, I don’t really care about proximity to the fashion industry. I’m very serious about good weather…I’m very serious about proximity to green spaces and fresh air…I’m dead serious about eating delicious seasonal produce!! I experience pangs of FOMO when I have to say no to an event invite that seems really cool (honestly, fewer of these than you’d think). But it passes. I think no matter where you live, you’ll feel some kind of FOMO about something that is out of reach. It is so easy to romanticize places you’re not.
Rachel: There were so many more opportunities had I been willing to move to NYC, but my son’s father was in Boston, and after my divorce, I would never have moved him far away from his dad. That was not even a thought in my mind.
Have you ever felt your work is taken less seriously because you're not based in a “major fashion hub?”
Kelly: I’ve always struggled with a bit of impostor syndrome. When I was in college and fashion blogging began in earnest, I think what worked was that there were women all over the country (or world) sharing their daily outfits. You could follow a girl who lived in the South and had very different styling than someone who lived on the West coast, East coast, etc. Then, as “influencing” became a larger part of companies' brand strategy, I think brands were flying these influencers to NYC or LA for events, photo shoots, etc. So part of me thinks I COULD be taken seriously if it weren’t for all the young girls moving to the city. Now I can’t separate the chicken from the egg; Are creators a big deal because they live in NYC, or are they in NYC because they wanted to be able to grow?
Viv: No. I think we are living in a time when you can live anywhere, write something that really resonates with people, and build an audience/get recognition for it.
I also think the hyperlocal is what actually drives mainstream culture and makes it cool and interesting! Like, who would Rick Owens be if he didn’t grow up in Porterville, California? Or Willy Chavarria without a childhood spent in Fresno? Every place shapes you in some way.
Rachel: I am not in the circle of younger, NYC-based writers. On any level. Not young, not NYC, and not a true “fashion” writer. I write on personal style and its joys in an approachable, authentic way. I write what I know (or ask). I am versed in fashion happenings, but nowhere near to the extent of, say, a Jalil Johnson. All of this is good for me! I am not at a place in my life where I want any of these things. I get to read Jalil –and do me. I like to think I am a guide, and we’re discovering together.
Has living in [insert your city here] made it harder to get into certain rooms or connect with certain people?
Kelly: There’s a level of hustle that comes with connecting to the fashion world without living in a major fashion city. I would have to convince a brand to invest in me more than someone who lives in the same city as they are based.
Viv: It is a disadvantage for in-person networking within the fashion and media industries. But again, my life and career trajectory are not centered or dependent on that, so I feel like I can pretty much live wherever I want and still do what I do!
Rachel: Probably. I like meeting people; had I lived in New York, I would have set up coffees and lunches. But now that I’m in Miami and feel so much HAPPIER (it’s palpable!), I am loath to leave, even when invitations are extended. I am grateful to be able to do what I do from the place I love.
What do you think people get wrong about the fashion scenes outside of NYC and LA?
Kelly: Well, I think it’s easy to assume there aren’t fashion scenes outside of big cities. Which is so funny because it’s actually just that the fashion is more subtle. As I mentioned, Colorado has a really strong sense of style. I could visit ANY city and notice the throughlines of what kind of shoes seem popular or what brands I see a lot. That is a scene; it’s just not as well documented, or maybe it’s less accepted.
Viv: The most stylish person in NYC or LA is on the same level as the most stylish person in SF or even a small rural town. But the average level of stylishness is where it differs, I’d say. SF has a lower average because the tech bros drag us down, lol.
Also, the Bay Area is an amazing vintage town. I grew up around a lot of secondhand/antique enthusiasm, and it felt very normalized.
Rachel: People tend to think that where they are is the only place to be – especially in the style and arts communities. But I see so much culture and vibrance in Miami and experience such a direct connection to style here. When the community is smaller, it’s less diluted, more open, and there is more sharing. I see these as advantages.
Is there anything liberating about not living in NYC? How has it allowed you to maintain a unique or alternative POV?
Kelly: The way I see it; NYC offers two major up-sides: (1) access to in-person fashion because brands are more shoppable there than in smaller cities, and (2) the CULTURE of wearing high-end brands. But NOT living in NYC removes me from the pressure of dressing any certain way and lets me listen to my own style POV better. Honestly, I get to play around with my style a lot because fewer people around me take style so seriously.
Viv: I’ve never lived in NYC, so I guess I just don’t think about it very much! I have been told by some readers and editors that they like that I am “removed” from NYC, and my point of view is different. Personally, I’m just such a California girl through and through that I don’t think you could ever take that out of me.
Rachel: I so admire the excitement of NYC and the grit it takes to live there and the work that’s come out of it. Living in Boston by comparison, my world felt limited and reactionary. I didn’t find that liberating. For me, what’s liberating about Miami is that people are warm and accepting. I still feel a clench in my body in New York sometimes. Being away from that makes the flow of ideas better for me. I like embracing the Miami-ness but also combining it with some of the bookish/prep of my childhood.
What do you think the fashion media world misses by focusing so heavily on NYC as the epicenter?
Kelly: The collective “we” holds NYC up as being a fashion epicenter, but by doing so we are flattening fashion and personal style into being defined by this one city. For example; Tokyo has become more and more of a city known for fashion, but what people wear there is quite different from NYC. If people who live in Tokyo are trying to fit the NYC mold, then we will miss out on the unique fashion that Tokyo has to offer, etc.
Viv: I guess just like, stories and subcultures that exist outside of one city. But they’re investing in where the $$$ and clicks and ad dollars are, and that’s NYC. And people do eat it up, like that West Village girl story—people are invested in that sort of gossipy NYC “scene” even if they don’t live there. There’s a fashion beat to be covered EVERYWHERE, it’s just not monetized or scaled in the same way.
Rachel: Even on Substack, which is virtual and global, so many of the writers you hear from are New Yorkers. As with any other community, you want a diverse range of perspectives. That lifts all of us, lifts the conversation.
Do you think people outside of NYC are treated more like “viewers” than active contributors in the fashion conversation in the media?
Kelly: Mmm, this is such an interesting question. I think you kind of hit the nail on the head, that it’s just hard to be taken seriously. In recent years, I’ve noticed there’s a real bend towards high-end brands (The Row, Toteme, etc.), and not being able to try those things on, not having a realistic reason to WEAR those brands, etc. means that.
Viv: I think America has a parasocial relationship with the city of NYC and what it symbolizes. So we care about what happens there, even if we don’t live there. It demands attention; we feed it attention. It’s a cycle.
Rachel: Maybe we treat ourselves that way! I went to this dinner in New York (I actually traveled, in the cold season!) with Jalil Johnson and others in what you think is a sort of NYC zeitgeist… but I was surprised to be so nicely received. Maybe I got nervous for nothing. Also – who cares? I don’t pretend to be anything more than what I am, and do – others have different expertise. It’s ok if someone sees me more as a viewer. I think my view is helpful, and I’m doing what I want to.
What advice would you give to younger fashion writers or creators who feel like they have to move to NYC?
Kelly: NYC is intoxicating. It’s such an awesome city that is literally admired GLOBALLY. So I think it’s easy to confuse that intoxication with the reality of living and working there. My touchstone is the fact that when fashion blogging began in the 2010s, MOST of those girls didn’t live in NYC, and they all had really unique styles that captured their initial audience. Being authentic is the best way to gain attention. Will you have to work a little harder? Probably, but you will also bring a perspective that (I predict) consumers will thirst for.
Viv: Move to a city because you truly want to, NYC or wherever! If you feel like you “have to” in a bad way that fills you with dread or anxiety, then maybe it’s not the right move for you. There are billions of people on this Earth who call different places home. Figure out what “home” means to you, what sort of place feeds your soul, and build your life around that.
Rachel: To “make it” in fashion, you have to try. Do what you know you’re good at. Be kind so people will want to help you along. I think, depending on how you define “make it,” you can live anywhere. And you should live where you can be happy, which to me is part of “making it.” But even if your gauge is subscriber numbers and bylines, look at Viv Chen, for example, in SF! She’s huge, she’s kind. She’s so fucking generous she’s showing all fashion writers how to do it with literal templates. The opposite of gatekeeping. Someone like that has success karma. So do not just ask for what you want, be kind, and share what you know. And if I can help, reach out to me! XOXO
Kelly, Viv, and Rachel prove that real style and smart voices come from every corner of the country, not just the five boroughs. Holding onto your space, your sanity, and your own perspective? That only makes your voice louder and sharper.
If packing up for NYC is your dream, then go crush it. I’m rooting for you. But let’s be real: fashion isn’t a one-way street paved with brownstones…even if Carrie Bradshaw has planted that seed into the heads of countless Gen Z women.
So, to anyone feeling “the pressure,” ditch the script. Write your own story. Be authentic. Don’t be a clone. Do your thing.
Talent doesn’t have a single zip code, and neither should this incredible industry.
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Weird how in a world that is digitally more connected than ever before that location is still so important.
Loved this - thank you! (Also hi Viv, fellow SF gal here!)